How many times do you fart per day?

[oki9Sedo]

"On average, a person produces about half a liter of fart gas per day, distributed over an average of about fourteen daily farts"-FactOnFarts.com

I do about a dozen a day.

[metalinvader]

At least 20..26 if I'm at work ( 90% male environment..You gotta expect a farting contest)

[oki9Sedo]

At least 20..26 if I'm at work ( 90% male environment..You gotta expect a farting contest)

Good man.

When I sleep in at weekends, I always do a huge one after getting up.

[Indyologist]

It depends on what I eat. Usually they are light and fluffy, but if I've eaten meat or certain kinds of vegetables... look out. Then they can either be loud enough to wake the dead or really, really quiet but they both smell really foul and eggy. The more fart-producing foods I eat, the more I let 'em go.

And yes, I am a pretty girl. So pretty girls do fart.

One of my favorite videos from youtube. Cracks me up every freaking time. Especially the one guy putting his butt against the door. Good gracious, what a wake up call!

<object width="425" height="355"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/o6vN4H6L458&rel=1"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/o6vN4H6L458&rel=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object>

[oki9Sedo]

My dad gets up early and farts every morning in the shower. Its routine now. It echoes all around the bathroom.

There's a weight training exercise called the "prone trap raise", which is guarenteed to make you fart.

[Gustav]

I don't fart that much because I burp a lot. If you don't burp, the gas will go down a become a fart. If you hold in a fart you get sick so let it out. Most people try to silence their farts by spreading the cheeks, but I find it far more satisfying the louder they are.

Personally I think it's rude when people try to pretend they don't fart. I mean who do they think they are? Do they intend to convince us that they're better than us farting mortals? Do they mean to propose that they are above having gas? Do they presume to put themselves on a pedestal by making their farts indetectable?

[herr gruber]

I can proudly say that I have never farted in my entire life. It's so disgusting. I prefer to keep it in and develop internal problems. I am currently a size 54 waistline due to severe bloating of the stomach but I'd rather look like a blimp than to release noxious odours.

I wonder if Indy ever farted? Perhaps that's why his trousers are so baggy: easy release.

[indifan101]

My dad does when he's watching tv and it's loud! Lol I laugh every freaking time

[oki9Sedo]

I can proudly say that I have never farted in my entire life. It's so disgusting. I prefer to keep it in and develop internal problems. I am currently a size 54 waistline due to severe bloating of the stomach but I'd rather look like a blimp than to release noxious odours.

I wonder if Indy ever farted? Perhaps that's why his trousers are so baggy: easy release.

Its impossible to not fart. You develop a certain volume of gas each day and it has to be released sometime.

I'm sure Indy has let rip the odd one in bed or between lectures.

[QBComics]

My mom does it, and when she farts its a "leave the room" smell. *shudders*

[Matinee Idyll]

I'm glad we can discuss important issues like farting alongside immature crap like religion.

[herr gruber]

Its impossible to not fart. You develop a certain volume of gas each day and it has to be released sometime.

I'm sure Indy has let rip the odd one in bed or between lectures.

Nevertheless, I can assure you that I have never farted in my life. Well, in the last hour, anyway. People have made money out of farting, you know. There was a guy who farted for a living on stage, Le Petomane.
He 'performed' at the Moulin Rouge.

[oki9Sedo]

Nevertheless, I can assure you that I have never farted in my life.

This business of not deliberately farting to save the environment is pointless, my friend, because it'll come out passively anyway. It has to. You're producing it all the time and it can't stay in your bowel.

So you're torturing yourself for nothing. You'll also fart alot more in your sleep, by the way. Not very pleasant for any woman you're in bed with. Or man, as the case may be. God forbid anything else.

Anyway, yes, there's also an English "performer" called Mr. Methane, who farts songs for a living:

http://www.mrmethane.com/

[sarah navarro]

I guess all our dads have something in common.....why do they have to fart so LOUD????especially in the car ewwwwwwwwwwww.

[Blackadder]

about 5 - 6 times , but my dad definetly beats me :p

[herr gruber]

This business of not deliberately farting to save the environment is pointless, my friend, because it'll come out passively anyway. It has to. You're producing it all the time and it can't stay in your bowel.

So you're torturing yourself for nothing. You'll also fart alot more in your sleep, by the way. Not very pleasant for any woman you're in bed with. Or man, as the case may be. God forbid anything else.

Anyway, yes, there's also an English "performer" called Mr. Methane, who farts songs for a living:

http://www.mrmethane.com/

"Or man as the case may be?!!!" "God forbid anything else"!!! Really, Oki9, a guy sleeps with a horse once and he gets called a pervert.
By the way, I have never farted. Did I mention that?

[oki9Sedo]

"Or man as the case may be?!!!" "God forbid anything else"!!! Really, Oki9, a guy sleeps with a horse once and he gets called a pervert.

I know, its ridiculous, isn't it? That sheep was every bit as up for it as I was.

By the way, I have never farted. Did I mention that?

That just means you're farting alot more than most in your sleep, and the gas is escaping passively when you're not aware of it.

[ReggieSnake]

strange...very strange. *cough*, moving right along...

[Indyologist]

strange...very strange. *cough*, moving right along...

Poor Reg-- our gas vapors are making him cough. Keep it down guys!

I wonder if Indy ever farted? Perhaps that's why his trousers are so baggy: easy release.

Heck, YEAH! Sheesh, I mean, imagine all the wierd food he's eaten, not to mention good old American grub! I'll bet Indy lets 'em go all over his house. Maybe sitting on his desk for that extra volume? Funny, you know, that guy in the middle of the video I posted (the one who puts his butt against the door) is built really similar to Indy. Think he might have woken up Shorty in the other room that way if they stayed in a hotel in Delhi?

Harrruuuupmh!

"Hahahaha. Okay, Dr. Jones. I awake now!"

[herr gruber]

I never thought my breaking wind procedures would garner such international exposure and analysis. Hey! My bowels are famous!
:sick:

[IndySeven]

Yuck, this thread is disgusting!:sick:

[No Ticket]

The proper term is flatulence gentlemen and/or gentle women.

[oki9Sedo]

Think he might have woken up Shorty in the other room that way if they stayed in a hotel in Delhi?

Harrruuuupmh!

"Hahahaha. Okay, Dr. Jones. I awake now!"

"Okey dokey Daktah Jones hold on to your potatoes!"

[yodazone]

Women definitely have the worst smelling farts on the planet.

:sick:

[herr gruber]

Check this out...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ylAD_2vqspY

[WillKill4Food]

Women definitely have the worst smelling farts on the planet.

Definitely. Especially about an hour after a date... in the backseat... with the windows rolled up. Put a damper on the whole damn thing.:( :sick:

[metalinvader]

Women definitely have the worst smelling farts on the planet.

:sick:


No..That would be Dogs..I swear...My dogs farts are always the worst!

[WillKill4Food]

Well, cats don't fart... i don't think. :confused: But catsh*t smells the worst.:sick:

[sarah navarro]

No..That would be Dogs..I swear...My dogs farts are always the worst!
Amen to that.My dogs stink up the whole house maybe we should change their diet because theyre horrible.:sick:

[The_Raiders]

Well, cats don't fart... i don't think. :confused: But catsh*t smells the worst.:sick:


Acually my cousins have a cat that farts, smell like egg salad :sick: And to think I told myself not to post on this thread. :rolleyes:

[herr gruber]

To the kind soul who voted 1* for the video. Did it not contain enough blandness for you? Jealousy. One of man's greatest evils.


;)

[barranca]

I fart constantly. So much so I am now the main source of power for a local school via a tube that runs directly from my ass to there furnaces.
I pray everyday there isn't a backdraft.

[-Jones-]

To fart or not to fart, that is the question!

Not to fart!

[Gear]

I can proudly say that I have never farted in my entire life. It's so disgusting. I prefer to keep it in and develop internal problems. I am currently a size 54 waistline due to severe bloating of the stomach but I'd rather look like a blimp than to release noxious odours.

I wonder if Indy ever farted? Perhaps that's why his trousers are so baggy: easy release.


Hahahahahaha!

One of my best friends once had a girl friend who tried to convince him that girls never sweat. :rolleyes:

[oki9Sedo]

Hahahahahaha!

One of my best friends once had a girl friend who tried to convince him that girls never sweat. :rolleyes:

If that were true, plenty of guys the world over would have had one less thing to do on a quiet evening alone.

[Rayder]

My mom is like the Pillsberrie Dough Boy except she farts instead of laughs (usually that's second). She also has a sleep button on here butt, everytime she sits down on the couch, she falls asleep.

As for me, I fart, a lot, Also everytime I yawn, I make catfish noises (so my dad calls them)
My horse farts all the time when I ride her, I think she gets nervous or something

[oki9Sedo]

My horse farts all the time when I ride her

Excuse me, this is a PG-13 site.

[WillKill4Food]

My horse farts all the time when I ride her, I think she gets nervous or something
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *Fart* HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *Fart* HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Thanks for the laugh. *Fart*:D :D :D :D :o