What would you do if...?

[Jay R. Zay]

http://www.tomgpalmer.com/images/Computer%20Spam.JPG

right, this thread is brought to you by me, not indifan. actually, it doesn't have much to do with "what would you do if...?" unless you'd think of "how would you react to spamming?". indifan doesn't want me to stain his interesting threads with inappropriate critizism so i thought he'd be happy to see i've "outsourced" the critizism to this thread.

so, back to topic (ha, i don't have to say so, i'm defining the topic, i can talk about everything i like): how do you like spamm? do you think the more threads you make the larger your thing (at least one synonym not affected by language control) will be? (excuse the profanity)

enjoy this thread :D me and indifan will have a tough competition for the "superfluous thread of the year" award.

by the way, did you notice the difference between real life spam and the picture on the tin? ;)

[tonydelvecchio]

Lovely, quite tastefully done. Look's like yummy,:p yummy in my tummy!

[VP]

Man: You sit here, dear.
Wife: All right.
Man: Morning!
Waitress: Morning!
Man: Well, what've you got?
Waitress: Well, there's egg and bacon; egg sausage and bacon; egg and spam; egg bacon and spam; egg bacon sausage and spam; spam bacon sausage and spam; spam egg spam spam bacon and spam; spam sausage spam spam bacon spam tomato and spam;
Vikings: Spam spam spam spam...
Waitress: ...spam spam spam egg and spam; spam spam spam spam spam spam baked beans spam spam spam...
Vikings: Spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam!
Waitress: ...or Lobster Thermidor a Crevette with a mornay sauce served in a Provencale manner with shallots and aubergines garnished with truffle pate, brandy and with a fried egg on top and spam.
Wife: Have you got anything without spam?
Waitress: Well, there's spam egg sausage and spam, that's not got much spam in it.
Wife: I don't want ANY spam!
Man: Why can't she have egg bacon spam and sausage?
Wife: THAT'S got spam in it!
Man: Hasn't got as much spam in it as spam egg sausage and spam, has it?
Vikings: Spam spam spam spam... (Crescendo through next few lines...)
Wife: Could you do the egg bacon spam and sausage without the spam then?
Waitress: Urgghh!
Wife: What do you mean 'Urgghh'? I don't like spam!
Vikings: Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!
Waitress: Shut up!
Vikings: Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!
Waitress: Shut up! (Vikings stop) Bloody Vikings! You can't have egg bacon spam and sausage without the spam.
Wife: I don't like spam!
Man: Sshh, dear, don't cause a fuss. I'll have your spam. I love it. I'm having spam spam spam spam spam spam spam beaked beans spam spam spam and spam!
Vikings: Spam spam spam spam. Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!
Waitress: Shut up!! Baked beans are off.
Man: Well could I have her spam instead of the baked beans then?
Waitress: You mean spam spam spam spam spam spam... (but it is too late and the Vikings drown her words)
Vikings: Spam spam spam spam. Lovely spam! Wonderful spam! Spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam. Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Spam spam spam spam!

http://www.mailmsg.com/SPAM_python.htm

[Rae-deemer]

I think that the picture on the tin shows fried spam. But it's all an evil plot......because spam is evil.:)

[tonydelvecchio]

I don't believe that's real spam in that picture. Real spam is much more gelatinous. I think that it's ham posing as spam.

[Jay R. Zay]

I don't believe that's real spam in that picture. Real spam is much more gelatinous. I think that it's ham posing as spam.

ham should know better than that.

[tonydelvecchio]

What I really want to know... who has the money to stuff meat (whatever it is) into what looks like a perfectly good laptop?

I could use a good laptop if anyone is thinking about stuffing their's full of spam!:rolleyes:

[Jay R. Zay]

What I really want to know... who has the money to stuff meat (whatever it is) into what looks like a perfectly good laptop?

can you judge the quality and order of a laptop by a photo of a small section of the front side and keys? if you can, i believe you could make a fortune with cyberspeed diagnostics. just show this guy a small photo of your laptop and he can tell you "bad virus on D:\", "CPU melted, replace", "HD cable needs to be repaired", "you need to defrag", ...

amazing. :p

[KDuncan]

Or, in this case, you need to de-spam.

[tonydelvecchio]

Judging from this photo I'd say that's a Hewlett Packard Pavilion ze4115
12.96 inches by 10.72 inches, 1.57 inches high, 6.4 pounds with a 14.1-inch XGA TFT screen, an AMD Athlon XP 1500+ Processor, 256 MB DDR SDRAM memory, 3.5" floppy and an 8X DVD/24X CD-RW combo drive, 30 GB Hard drive. Network, modem, printer, VGA out, Com/RS-232 port, PS/2 mouse/keyboard, S-Video out (for sending to television), 2 USB ports, 2 PC Card slots, and infrared Ports and adapters. Battery life of (about) 2 hours. In the upper righthand corner there are some numbers that tell me it comes with full-featured Corel WordPerfect word processor and Quattro Pro spreadsheets.

Not a bad laptop, but not a great one either. :p

Oh, and the 3.5" floppy drive is jammed up with some sort of meat product. :D

[indifan101]

enjoy this thread :D me and indifan will have a tough competition for the "superfluous thread of the year" award.



Oh boy Zay can't wait for that one! Congrats to you Zay your one of my Arch Enemies!

[Finn]

Judging from this photo I'd say that's a Hewlett Packard Pavilion ze4115
12.96 inches by 10.72 inches, 1.57 inches high, 6.4 pounds with a 14.1-inch XGA TFT screen, an AMD Athlon XP 1500+ Processor, 256 MB DDR SDRAM memory, 3.5" floppy and an 8X DVD/24X CD-RW combo drive, 30 GB Hard drive. Network, modem, printer, VGA out, Com/RS-232 port, PS/2 mouse/keyboard, S-Video out (for sending to television), 2 USB ports, 2 PC Card slots, and infrared Ports and adapters. Battery life of (about) 2 hours. In the upper righthand corner there are some numbers that tell me it comes with full-featured Corel WordPerfect word processor and Quattro Pro spreadsheets. ...not to mention the hard disk cooler fan is dusty, badly requiring a sweep. The owner's about 34 ½ years old, red-haired and the last thing he did with this one (prior to stuffing spam into the disk drive) was playing minesweeper and listening some midis (MP3s too developed for this one) - mostly famous movie tunes. The owner has stuffed his pr0n files into directory c:\program files\hubble\devs\support.

And right shift does not go down all the way either.

[Jay R. Zay]

Oh boy Zay can't wait for that one! Congrats to you Zay your one of my Arch Enemies!

oo-hooh.:eek:

you're so sweet when you're so serious. :o

[tonydelvecchio]

...not to mention the hard disk cooler fan is dusty, badly requiring a sweep. The owner's about 34 ½ years old, red-haired and the last thing he did with this one (prior to stuffing spam into the disk drive) was playing minesweeper and listening some midis (MP3s too developed for this one) - mostly famous movie tunes. The owner has stuffed his pr0n files into directory c:\program files\hubble\devs\support.

And right shift does not go down all the way either.

Also, we may note that the owner of this laptop liked peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. this is evident from the tell-tale smear pattern on the "ctrl" and ">/." keys.

The hard drive also needs to be de-fragged.

[indifan101]

oo-hooh.:eek:

you're so sweet when you're so serious. :o

Your sounding gay again.

[Jay R. Zay]

Your sounding gay again.

yeah, i knew you'd like it. :)

[tonydelvecchio]

That is just too funny! You guys are soooo cute!:D

[KDuncan]

That is just too funny! You guys are soooo cute!:D


Take it from me, it gets better. :D Just wait until ToJ and Jay are on at the same time.