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-   -   Worst '80s "Raiders" Rip-Off (http://raven.theraider.net/showthread.php?t=8468)

Stoo 11-07-2005 11:13 PM

Worst '80s "Raiders" Rip-Off
 
How about an Indy-related poll? I was curious about your opinions on which
was the WORST 1980's spin-off of "Raiders of the Lost Ark". (If you liked any,
feel free to talk about them, too. There are some I do enjoy... in all their
schlock glory).

Hard choice but my vote for absolute WORST goes to "Perils of Gwendoline".

My favourite is the Italian made "Jungle Raiders". You can view a trailer here:
http://videodetective.com/home.asp?PublishedID=2081

Let's see those votes, y'all...

indifan101 11-08-2005 08:43 AM

I hated Romancing the stone! This movie sucked ass! It was the most stupidest thing Iv'e ever seen!

VP 11-08-2005 09:12 AM

I have only seen Romancing the Stone and it was great.

Finn 11-08-2005 11:26 AM

Guess I'll have to say the Allan Quatermain films... simply for that they don't even try to hide that they're trying to get some hard-earned cash out of them who enjoyed Indiana Jones.

Or if they do try, they're doing a lousy job.

Ska 11-08-2005 03:27 PM

I'll give a bried description on the ones I've seen:

1984 - Romancing the Stone - 8 out of 10 One of the better Indy rip-offs (when comparing to the others). Danny DiVito can go to hell though. He couldn't act his way out of a room of falling spikes.

1984 - The Perils of Gwendoline in the Land of the Yik-Yak - 0 out of 10 A lost city of topless dominatrixes...sure it sounds like a fun place to be...but I don't want to find it...or want to watch this movie ever again. WORST MOVIE EVER!!! If anyone says otherwise, they haven't seen this movie.

1985 - King Solomon's Mines + Allan Quatermain and the Lost City of Gold - 5 out of 10 I enjoyed it until the ending. And what was with that random lion?

1986 - Firewalker 8 out of 10 Not a Chuck Norris fan, but this movie is interesting and a great tribute to Indy. One of my fav's.

1986 - Jungle Raiders 4 out of 10 This movie has more cheese than Wisconsin.

1986 - The Mines of Kilimanjaro 7 out of 10 Follows the general adventure movie plot...but w/o all the cheesy acting and stunts.

Jay R. Zay 11-08-2005 04:33 PM

if you add "Romancing the Stone", why not "Crocodile Dundee"? actually, RtS didn't have so much to do with Raiders, it was just made up a little to look like an hommage. it rather is a usual action thriller, not even much of adventure about it - and not a very good one, either. the "archaeology" part was rather ridiculous. one of the greatest flaws about RtS was the soundtrack that ruined the better part of the mood. "look, must be somewhere in the mud. ah, yes. found it."

ts...

probably they've kidnapped michael douglas and made him play his part.

anyway - i'm looking forward to seeing Sky Pirates, called "Dakota Harris" in germany, written in the indiana jones font. at least in a more recent release from kinowelt. :rolleyes:



edit: shít, someday even i will learn not to put images in quote tags.

Stoo 11-09-2005 05:10 PM

"Crocodile Dundee"? Are you kidding?

The poster and TV commercials for "Romancing the Stone" showed that it was
marketed as a modern-day-Indiana Jones-type film. Then again, you weren't
even born at the time so I wouldn't expect you to know any better...

"Sky Pirates" was released on VHS in Canada as "Dakota Harris" as well.
Anyway, don't get your hopes up too high for this one. It's not very good.

I also forgot add "The Further Adventures of Tennessee Buck" from 1988.
(Even though it doesn't deserve to be named the worst).

Jay R. Zay 11-10-2005 10:12 AM

stoo, it sometimes sounds terribly stupid when you try to play the smartass.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stoo
"Crocodile Dundee"? Are you kidding?


no, bud, if i'm kidding you will notice that there is an array of smileys like:
";) :) :D :D :D :p ;) ;) :p :p " to make sure you get the joke. okay? i've explained why i mentioned this movie.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stoo
The poster and TV commercials for "Romancing the Stone" showed that it was marketed as a modern-day-Indiana Jones-type film. Then again, you weren't even born at the time so I wouldn't expect you to know any better...


actually, if your knowledge is limited to things that took place only after your birth, you should brush it up a little. i own "Romancing the Stone", so i know the cover, i know it looks like "Indiana Jones" and nevertheless (i've said so) i don't think the movie has much in common with indy, it just was (did you read my reply), made up (my version of your "marketed" to look like "Raiders". which doesn't mean the movies have to have much in common. "Welcome to the Jungle"/"The Rundown" also clearly refers to "Raiders" but i wouldn't call it a "Raiders" spin off just because of this.

on the other hand, it was made in 2003, when you might already have drifted into senility for your old age, so i wouldn't expect you to know.

my reply doesn't sound like i was poorly informed so i don't see a reason for you to read it like this. okay? i think i'm rather well informed about movies and not just about movies that were made after '86 or after i was allowed to go to cinema on my own.

after what i heard about "Sky Pirates", the ending is supposed to be a desaster but before that it might be okay. i don't usually expect to see a "good" movie anymore, i've seen enough so that i now can live with a "rather entertaining" movie as well. really "good" ones are rare.

Stoo 11-10-2005 03:15 PM

Oh, brother...Jay, you are such a jackass...

Does everything have to be an argument with you? It's a simple poll.
Where others have voted and offered their opinions on the titles above,
the main thing you want to do is criticize. You really are a bigger baby
than I thought.

Yes, Temple of John, "Remo Williams" was indeed a stinker and if the poll
didn't have a maximum of 10 choices, I would have considered listing it.
So...did you vote? Let's hear which one you picked as the worst.

Jay R. Zay 11-10-2005 03:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stoo
Does everything have to be an argument with you? It's a simple poll.


i'm not arguing about the poll, i'm a little pissed by your arrogant reply. if you don't like to read my reaction, don't post bull****. or leave the forum. if you don't and if you continue posting bull****, you will get them.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stoo
You really are a bigger baby than I thought.


this is why you should let me do the thinking.

Stoo 11-10-2005 04:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SKAbatula
1986 - Firewalker 8 out of 10 Not a Chuck Norris fan, but this movie is interesting and a great tribute to Indy. One of my fav's.

1986 - Jungle Raiders 4 out of 10 This movie has more cheese than Wisconsin.

1986 - The Mines of Kilimanjaro 7 out of 10 Follows the general adventure movie plot...but w/o all the cheesy acting and stunts.

Hey, SKA, thanks for posting. Your high rating of "Firewalker" is surprising
and makes me want to give it another try. Yes, the cheese is abundant in
"Jungle Raiders" but I think that is one the film's charms (and the beginning
has a cool twist). As for "Mines of Kilimanjaro", too bad it had such a low
budget, otherwise it could have been much better.

Have you seen "The Further Adventures of Tennessee Buck"?

Paden 11-10-2005 05:31 PM

I hadn't thought about Firewalker in quite some time, but I remember it as being an enjoyable little movie. Nothing outstanding, but a fun way to while away a couple of hours. As far as the worst, my vote would have to go to the Richard Chamberlain Quatermain movies, particularly The Lost City of Gold. Granted, I haven't seen it in many years, so my recollection may be exaggerated, but my memories of it are of a film that was painfully bad. How James Earl Jones got talked into signing up for it remains a true mystery to me.

Ska 11-12-2005 06:13 PM

I actually enjoy the 80's version of King Solomon's Mines. Sure it rips Indy off more than a NY street vendor, but it's fun and (to me) captures the charm of an Indy movie.

EDIT: By the way, ToJ, the original King Solomon's Mines was made in 1937 (I think). Not exactly sure about the year, but it was definitely before the 60's. There have been about 5 or 6 versions of the novel.

Paden 11-14-2005 11:35 AM

Does anyone have any strong recollection of Treasure of the Four Crowns? It's one on the list I haven't seen, but based on a few reviews I read at Amazon, it sounds like it would be a hoot to watch, in a Mystery Science Theater 3000 kind of way. From the sound of it, it was so bad it was hysterically entertaining, especially with the 3-D "throw everything at the screen" aspect.

TombReader 11-14-2005 03:47 PM

Would I get kicked off this forum if I said that I used to like watching 'Tales of the Gold Monkey'?Maybe not a program I'd enjoy now,but when you're 7-8 years old,it was cool enough. :p :D

Paden 11-14-2005 04:26 PM

Hey! Why does it read "Guest" now under TombReader's name? Weird. ;)

Stoo 11-14-2005 05:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TombReader
Would I get kicked off this forum if I said that I used to like watching 'Tales of the Gold Monkey'?Maybe not a program I'd enjoy now,but when you're 7-8 years old,it was cool enough. :p :D

Kicked off? Doubt it. I used to watch the show faithfully and would love to
have the 2 hour pilot for my collection. I remember it being on at the same
time as "Bring 'Em Back Alive" (another "Raiders" cash-in with Bruce Boxleitner
playing Frank Buck) but would always choose "...Gold Monkey" instead.
I agree that the show might not hold up so well today but back then it
was the perfect fix for any "Raiders" fan who wanted more.

Paden, "Treasure of the Four Crowns" was excrutiatingly bad! If you can find
it on video, the booby traps may be interesting to see but without the 3-D,
I couldn't imagine sitting through the whole thing. If you're looking for a good
laugh then, by all means, check it out.

Aaron H 11-14-2005 11:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Paden
Hey! Why does it read "Guest" now under TombReader's name? Weird. ;)

Don't give us ideas...hehehehe (we need an evil smily)

Moebius 03-04-2008 11:49 AM

High Road to China

Stoo 03-04-2008 12:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Moebius
High Road to China

Ha! Wow, old thread. I didn't put "High Road to China" in the poll because:

1)There's no treasure/artifact so I didn't feel it actually fit the category.
2)That movie has gotten MUCH better with age. I like it!

Anyway, you thought it was really bad? To each his own, I guess!:)

oki9Sedo 03-04-2008 12:34 PM

I haven't even seen any of those except for Romancing the Stone, which I enjoyed.

Ska 03-04-2008 12:47 PM

Ah...this thread again!

Just when I finally got Perils of Gwendoline out of my head...:down:

Indyologist 03-04-2008 12:47 PM

You forgot the movie Yellow Hair and the Fortress of Gold. As soon as it came out, I found it instantly stupid w/out even seeing it. The title just blew it. Even the font on the movie poster is an Indy rip-off. If you click on the poster, you'll see she even has a whip. An Indy poser if ever I saw one.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0088427/

Ska 03-04-2008 01:10 PM

Ya know, about 4 years ago I saw the Yellow Hair DVD at Best Buy...I almost bought it...just to add to the Indy ripoff collection...but something told me not to.

I figured I'd rent it, but haven't found it yet to do so.

oki9Sedo 03-04-2008 02:38 PM

I think the only reason that awful Allan Quatermain film is being voted the worst is because literally nobody saw the likes of Jungle Raiders and Sky Pirates, and therefore nobody is voting for them.

I've never even HEARD of them, let alone seen them.


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