Cracked articles pick apart Indiana Jones

Drifter, I think you missed this one!

The 7 Most Irritating Characters From Otherwise Great Movies


#2.Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom

...when it came time to make the Raiders of the Lost Ark prequel, Temple of Doom, Spielberg decided to match Indy up with Willie Scott, a stereotypical ditzy, blonde nightclub singer (played by an actress who later married Stephen Spielberg).


Alright, we understand Spielberg's motivation here...

But hey, at least in this flick Spielberg resisted the urge to insert a sassy, precocious child... ah, wait, sorry. This movie featured lots and lots of Short Round, the Chinese kid from Goonies.


...but this choice leads to some disturbing questions.

How They Nearly Ruined The Movie:

Willie, the blonde bimbo, is supposed to serve as the comedic relief, but does so by embodying about every ugly stereotype about women ever invented. She's shallow and materialistic; during a gunfight, she's crawling on the floor trying to find a diamond and mourns, annoyingly, about a couple holes in her dress. Later, she's very interested to meet the Maharajah because she hears he's rich. She's stupid; she loses Indy's gun because it's hot, and complains about cracking a nail (damage to her nails being a recurring complaint). She gets hysterical when there's danger; she almost lets Indy and Short Round die because she freaks out at the sight of a bug.

It's like Spielberg was trying to make up for having previously written a strong female character in Marion. Remember her from Raiders? She punched people, drank men under the table and stood up to the Nazis. What the hell happened to Spielberg's opinion of women between 1981 and 1984?


There's a mild disparity, is what we're saying.

As for Short Round, he embodies several dozen of the Bad Child Character traits we mentioned above, with the added fun of being foreign, which the film wants us to find endlessly hilarious. So the adorable little scamp gets lines like "He no nuts, he crazy!" and "You cheat very big!" One of his very first lines in the movie is "Hokey dokey, Dr. Jones, hold onto your potatoes!"

Let's just stop there and enjoy this YouTube clip of him getting punched in the face:
<iframe width="560" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/i9jBiosg1x4" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Cracked is SO funny! Ha Ha Ha!
 

kongisking

Active member
Montana Smith said:
Shorty was a far more annoying stereotype. Willie was the foil, and intentionally annoying. Shorty was a precocious mini-Indy and unintentionally annoying.

Eh, I found both amusing. Shorty moreso than Willie, but nevertheless, both were fun characters.
 

The Drifter

New member
A great user-review at Amazon.

ChildsIndianaJonesCostume.png
 

The Drifter

New member
Look what's at the number one spot in the Top 10 Sequels that Aren't As Bad As Everyone said...

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/B4fsrzp8Mhw" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

And something else to tickle your fancy.

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/BkNHxQ3aqAg" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

PS: I really wish a mod would change this thread's title.
 

JasonMa

Active member
The 3rd dumbest moment really isn't. Mythbusters tested it (using that specific scene as the example) and found that if you could keep the raft level in air with you on top of it it would slow you down enough to survive the fall. Its highly, highly unlikely that anyone could do that and walk away from it, but isn't that what Indy's all about, surviving against narrow odds?
 

Raiders90

Well-known member
JasonMa said:
The 3rd dumbest moment really isn't. Mythbusters tested it (using that specific scene as the example) and found that if you could keep the raft level in air with you on top of it it would slow you down enough to survive the fall. Its highly, highly unlikely that anyone could do that and walk away from it, but isn't that what Indy's all about, surviving against narrow odds?

Ok, but what about the subsequent tumble through a dense forest, miraculously without hitting any trees, and the raft (with Indy and co inside) FALLING OFF A GIANT CLIFF?!?
 

Crack that whip

New member
The Drifter said:
Look what's at the number one spot in the Top 10 Sequels that Aren't As Bad As Everyone said...

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/B4fsrzp8Mhw" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Whoa! I'm astounded by that video - not by anything having to do with Indy, but Gremlins 2: The New Batch and Back to the Future - Part III?! I didn't have any idea these were even commonly regarded this way. Both movies were extremely well-received when my friends and I saw them, back in the day (1990), both by our group and the entire rest of the audiences we saw them with. I do occasionally see a comment online these days by someone who doesn't care for either of the Back to the Future sequels, say, and wishes they'd stopped after the first, but I didn't think these responses were widely held. Are they? Really?

Obviously, I'm pretty much in agreement with the video's commentator on both of those movies, as well as the one about the guy with the hat and the whip. I have to say I agree about Spider-Man 3, too, though with that one I was at least certainly aware lots of people think it sucks (and while I do enjoy the movie, I agree it's not as good as either of the first two).
 

The Drifter

New member
I'm not too sure if this has been posted anywhere on the forum, but here is an article showing Harrison Ford's handwritten notes on his copy of the Raiders script.
 

The Drifter

New member
Montana Smith said:
Internet connection in a rusted out old car is a bit hit or miss.

It is. Plus I almost melted my old laptop one night. I left it too close to the campfire when I went to take a leak. Close call that one was!
 
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