AICN Indy 5 MacGuffin essay contest

RaiderMitch

TR.N Staff Member
Indiana Jones and the Sword of Kings

1961. JFK is obsessed with finding Excalibur. In the 1940s the sword was recovered by Joe Kennedy but was lost when he was killed.

The US Government recruits retired professor Indiana Jones. Indy turns them down, they ask "Mutt" to do it. Indy is urged by Marion to go with Mutt who is not "up to the challenge". Reluctantly, Indy goes.

In the jungles of Vietnam, Indy meets up with Chinese and Russian adventurers - after globe trotting chases - aboard subs, and a climatic ending at the North Pole - Indy recovers Excalibur - but Kennedy is acting very "power" mad when he gets it in his hands and talks about ruling the world. Indy takes Excalibur from Kennedy. It is too powerful for anyone on earth to wield. Kennedy agrees and says he will run the country without any mystical power protecting him. He tells Indy it would take a man of with a strong arm and pure spirit not take the magic sword and be tempted to use it. He assures Indy that Excalibur will be placed somewhere safe from mankind.

Indy and Mutt return home to Marion.

1969. The Moon. Neil Armstrong removes a box from the lander and reads a letter from JFK. He opens the box and takes Excalibur out. He holds it and stares at it, and then tosses it into the ?sea of tranquility?. The lander blasts off and covers Excalibur under moon dust.
 

Mickiana

Well-known member
RaiderMitch said:
The lander blasts off and covers Excalibur under moon dust.

Or.... the lander blasts off and shows Excalibur lying on top of a secret Nazi base that was hitherto covered up. Now zee Germans have Excalibur!!!
 

Henry Jones VII

Active member
Lance Quazar said:
As promised, here is my entry.

Have at it, folks....


Indiana Jones and the Undiscovered Country**

It?s 1960 and Indiana Jones has settled into a quiet life, embarking on a worldwide lecture tour with his wife and son. While in Paris, Dr. Jones is approached by a brash former archaeology student, LELAND.

Leland has information on how to obtain a rare copy of the Tibetan Book of the Dead which, he promises, will lead to a legendary beyul - a hidden Shangri La-esque utopia somewhere in the Himalayas, where the boundaries between the realms of life and death are at their most fragile.

Indy refuses to join Leland on his quest, but Mutt, having learned that Marion has recently been diagnosed with cancer ? a secret she has been keeping from her family, goes with him, defying his father and bringing along Indy?s research. Having heard all about Indy?s adventures, Mutt hopes the mystical valley might contain a supernatural cure for his mother.

When his wife and son disappear without a trace, Indy is hot on the trail. The traitorous Leland, in cahoots with the Red Chinese, is desperate to find the beyul and uncover its powers.

No matter the outcome of the mission, Indy is confronted with the prospect of a profound loss. But he is desperate to shield his loved ones from the embrace of death for as long as possible. In the end, quests are abandoned, villains are vanquished, sacrifices are made and the Jones family learns the that the most precious treasure of all is life itself.


**Yes, I know the title was used in a Trek film, but it works much better here and has a nice double meaning.

I liked it, good job. (y)
 
Indiana Jones And The End Of The Point

America, 2012

A pale middle aged man is lying in bed snoring. He suddenly farts explosively and wakes up with a start.

A cgi mouse pokes its head out of the skirting board and wrinkles its nose to camera, in comedy fashion.

The man scratches his head, yawns, gets out of bed, walks over to the computer in the corner of the room. Its monitor is displaying Theraider.net subforum INDIANA JONES 5.

He switches the computer off and goes back to bed.

The comedy mouse reappears and shrugs.

The end.
 
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replican't said:
Indiana Jones And The End Of The Point

America, 2012

A pale middle aged man is lying in bed snoring. He suddenly farts explosively and wakes up with a start.

A cgi mouse pokes its head out of the skirting board and wrinkles its nose to camera, in comedy fashion.

The man scratches his head, yawns, gets out of bed, walks over to the computer in the corner of the room. Its monitor is displaying Theraider.net subforum INDIANA JONES 5.

He switches the computer off and goes back to bed.

The comedy mouse reappears and shrugs.

The end.
You left out his arch enemy!

His creepy landlord with survailance equipment ghosting his online activity and flatulence so he can satisfy his depraved impuse to reclaim his lost virtue.

Now you've got something...
 

Archaeos

Member
Interesting that all the submissions by Raveners are - in my view - really good, mature, and use a believable and appealing McGuffin.

Without me being acidic for its own sake, but everything that was on Ain't It Cool made it clear that the solution to Hollywood's quality issues isn't with the current generation of aspiring screenwriters (=AIC readers... scary thought).

I particularly liked how the submission of Jonathan Foster on AIC concludes with...
[It] restores Indy’s and Marion’s Raiders youthful appearance (CGI!!) and reunites him with Sallah, Marcus Brody, Short Round, Belloq, and Allison Doody(CGI)!!
Riiight, so Allison Doody requires a CGI job, but Denholm Elliott is just waiting in the wings to reprise his role of Marcus... without any CGI needed for that feast...

We really need an Indy facepalm smiley... there is even space left for two new ones in the Smilies Box of the Reply to Thread writer. I will even say "PLEEAAAZZZE!1!"

2388502-double_facepalm.jpg
 
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Lance Quazar

Well-known member
Archaeos said:
Interesting that all the submissions by Raveners are - in my view - really good, mature, and use a believable and appealing McGuffin.

Everything posted in this thread is better than everything that won.
 

Moedred

Administrator
Staff member
I'm pleased that a passing fan like Kidd unfamiliar with the expanded universe favored Eden. Yet I reckon he was just skimming for MacGuffins. The Shroud, like Excalibur, is one of my fave not-necessarily-magical MacGuffins, Gonzo.
Dr. Gonzo said:
it seems everyone else actually presented an outline of their whole film... which I guess was the death knell for me.
I crammed in everything but the kitchen sink and that didn't work either! :) Previously seen here, here and here.

Indiana Jones and the Star Wars
1968. Britain sends Indy to investigate a medieval ghost ship which appeared near the Bermuda Triangle during a hurricane. Cloaked figures plunder its cargo, Excalibur. Indy fights and pursues them to the Bahamas and retrieves Excalibur from the Duchess of Windsor, hoping to reclaim the throne. Landing at Cape Canaveral, Indy helplessly watches Excalibur lift off with Apollo 8 to be jettisoned into Lacus Oblivionis on the far side of the moon.
NASA enlists Indy: legend says the Lighthouse of Alexandria could ignite a ship on the horizon. Indy suspects it featured the lens from Archimedes death ray, lost at the siege of Syracuse 35 years earlier.
Meanwhile, Mutt documents the grail temple ruins and encounters Elsa, who hasn?t aged. She seduces Mutt before Indy can stop them, and later reveals she's pregnant... but by Jones I, II or III?
Russians acquire the lens, forcing Indy to stow away on a Soyuz rocket to dismantle the retrofitted weaponized satellite. Back on Earth, he?s placed in a Soviet cyclotron, the beam focused through the lens ? on him! Accelerated particles create a wormhole through which Indy stumbles with the lens of apparent alien design.
Indy emerges when the cyclotron is decommissioned in present day under the supervision of a British Lord. Turns out his mother, Elsa (now played by Alison Doody) proved his noble lineage through genetic testing after the grail knight revived and bedded her with the help of the grail and liquid Viagra.
 
Moedred said:
I'm pleased that a passing fan like Kidd unfamiliar with the expanded universe favored Eden. Yet I reckon he was just skimming for MacGuffins. The Shroud, like Excalibur, is one of my fave not-necessarily-magical MacGuffins, Gonzo.

I crammed in everything but the kitchen sink and that didn't work either! :) Previously seen here, here and here.

Indiana Jones and the Star Wars
1968. Britain sends Indy to investigate a medieval ghost ship which appeared near the Bermuda Triangle during a hurricane. Cloaked figures plunder its cargo, Excalibur. Indy fights and pursues them to the Bahamas and retrieves Excalibur from the Duchess of Windsor, hoping to reclaim the throne. Landing at Cape Canaveral, Indy helplessly watches Excalibur lift off with Apollo 8 to be jettisoned into Lacus Oblivionis on the far side of the moon.
NASA enlists Indy: legend says the Lighthouse of Alexandria could ignite a ship on the horizon. Indy suspects it featured the lens from Archimedes death ray, lost at the siege of Syracuse 35 years earlier.
Meanwhile, Mutt documents the grail temple ruins and encounters Elsa, who hasn?t aged. She seduces Mutt before Indy can stop them, and later reveals she's pregnant... but by Jones I, II or III?
Russians acquire the lens, forcing Indy to stow away on a Soyuz rocket to dismantle the retrofitted weaponized satellite. Back on Earth, he?s placed in a Soviet cyclotron, the beam focused through the lens ? on him! Accelerated particles create a wormhole through which Indy stumbles with the lens of apparent alien design.
Indy emerges when the cyclotron is decommissioned in present day under the supervision of a British Lord. Turns out his mother, Elsa (now played by Alison Doody) proved his noble lineage through genetic testing after the grail knight revived and bedded her with the help of the grail and liquid Viagra.


Very good, but not enough woman-punching for my liking.
 
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