Online relationships
- Thread starter The_Raiders
- Start date
Kooshmeister
New member
I think online relationships are okay, but no substitute for actual human interaction. However for socially backwards people like myself, it's the quickest and most comfortable means of meeting people. 'Course, take it from me, it's as fraught with peril as any relationship, especially if it goes for too long without an actual face-to-face meeting between the lovebirds. 
sarah navarro
New member
CongratulationsAyrun said:I came in to contact with a guy through the internet, several years ago.
I wasn´t looking for anyone, nor was he. But we met in real life not long after and been together ever since.
We got married 2 weeks ago.
I think its better to have a relationship in real life only because i find it extremly hard for to trust someone through a computer,but you never know anything can happen.
The_Raiders
Well-known member
Ayrun said:I came in to contact with a guy through the internet, several years ago.
I wasn´t looking for anyone, nor was he. But we met in real life not long after and been together ever since.
We got married 2 weeks ago.
Wow two weeks ago? Caongrats!!
. Here I am going to the midnight showing later and I can't even go with my love , but there's always hope for an Indy 5.
The_Raiders said:Wow two weeks ago? Caongrats!!
sarah navarro said:Congratulations
Thanks!
sarah navarro said:I think its better to have a relationship in real life only because i find it extremly hard for to trust someone through a computer,but you never know anything can happen.
True, anything can happen, but one should always be cautious, as you never know who you´re talking to over the internet.
Violet
Moderator Emeritus
Online relationships? I don't think I'm that desperate yet even if I haven't been with a boyfriend for like.... 2 and half years. A lot of my friends and colleagues have someone, and yeah there are times, where I feel kind of lonely. Especially last night where this guy who was hired by the radio station to entertain the crowd dressed as Indy and with a bullwhip refered to my friend (who is a girl) as my "boyfriend." I can't work out if he was trying to pick me up or make fun of me....
Anyway, I find online just a little creepy and I'd rather talk to people on the phone or meet them face-to-face.
I'm kind of confused as to who the girl is....
Anyway, I find online just a little creepy and I'd rather talk to people on the phone or meet them face-to-face.
I'm kind of confused as to who the girl is....
Man people are crazy. Online relationships, it doesn't even sound right. I love you person who lives in another country and I can't touch or see. Also I never met you but your facebook says you like pizza and dvds, so do I! It just seems beyond desperate to me, its sad. Your essentially having a relationship w/ your computer monitor and your imagination.
Go outside people. I am waiting for the day where my computer can just hook right up to my head, and feed me, clean my bowells, tell me it loves me and holds my hand and reads me Dr. Suess while I fall asleep.
Go outside people. I am waiting for the day where my computer can just hook right up to my head, and feed me, clean my bowells, tell me it loves me and holds my hand and reads me Dr. Suess while I fall asleep.
The_Raiders
Well-known member
Wait, hold on. I wasn't desperate, and I wasn't even searching for anyone. Like I said we just stummbled across eachother and I love this girl. True love doesn't have to be limited to who's next door or in your neighborhood or community. And no one has the right to say me and this girls relationship is desperate, or crazy or whatever else people say just because we met online.
|ZiR|
New member
Deckard said:Man people are crazy. Online relationships, it doesn't even sound right. I love you person who lives in another country and I can't touch or see. Also I never met you but your facebook says you like pizza and dvds, so do I! It just seems beyond desperate to me, its sad. Your essentially having a relationship w/ your computer monitor and your imagination.
Go outside people. I am waiting for the day where my computer can just hook right up to my head, and feed me, clean my bowells, tell me it loves me and holds my hand and reads me Dr. Suess while I fall asleep.
Eh, I agree with you... to an extent. But I think the internet is an invaluable resource for gay men, especially those who aren't into the bar/club scene, to connect with eachother. There aren't that many other options for us.
You breeders have it so easy, you don't even know.
Violet
Moderator Emeritus
The_Raiders said:
I'm not saying that. I saying that I don't understand how anyone can fall in love with someone online... I find it hard enough in real life... And in my mind, you technically haven't "met". It's like saying you met through an ad for a penpal and fell in love through love letters without seeing each other face-to-face. Call me old-fashioned if you will. I'm not telling you or the girl in question that you're desperate or crazy. If it works for you then it works but you both should probably find a way to talk to each other on the phone at least so neither of you can get the wrong impression of each other.
I noticed that my and Deckard's posts are the only ones who challenge the idea of online relationships everyone else was positive. It seems you were looking for reassurance to me.
The_Raiders
Well-known member
Huh? Reassurance? Well I wasn't mad or anything at anybody, I was just saying I don't think love is limited just to who you see in person. And we are taking it nice and slowly, and were talking about the phone, but we'll figure everything out. I acually have never liked the idea of online dating, and didn't want to try it, but I stumbled across this girl and I think she is the greates person ever. She's opened my mind up to alot of new things, and we have alot in commen, but there's alot of things we don't have in commen, which I think is good becasue that makes things more interesting. 
Hawkeye
New member
The_Raiders said:
Amen! If I followed the "norm" in regards to relationships, I would be some lonely schmuck sitting at home with nothing to do. Instead, I met the girl of my dreams on Myspace and now we're engaged. Granted, we've actually met and dated, but if I listened to every person that told me it was crazy, I wouldn't be near as happy as I am.
The_Raiders
Well-known member
Hawkeye said:
I'm glad you met someone that really makes you happy man!
, it's nice to hear things like that. . Yes this girl makes me SO happy, she's everything I could ever hope for and ALOT more. Everyone has a right to do it their own way, but I still say love isn't limited. edit: And I am not mad or anything at what anyone has to say, it gives us both stuff to think about, but I still stick strong to waht I said, and I still love this girl.
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I don't really see an issue with it. As long as you don't define all your expectations by what you do online and take things slowly, I think it has real potential. You sound as though you have an interest in her and therefore an intention to get to know her better, so that's a great start. I suppose I wouldn't be so quick to just call it a relationship. Meet up for some coffee, develop it into a dinner date and take it from there.
While you get along online, I still maintain that the internet can still be quite depersonalised, especially if you're just using text. But it's a beginning and by the sounds of things, a very promising one. I hope it works out for you both
While you get along online, I still maintain that the internet can still be quite depersonalised, especially if you're just using text. But it's a beginning and by the sounds of things, a very promising one. I hope it works out for you both
Major West
Member
Violet Indy said:
It could be argued that a relationship started through comunication of the written word is stronger than one that involved going on a date to the local multiplex and not really talking a great deal.
The_Raiders
Well-known member
Joel said:I don't really see an issue with it. As long as you don't define all your expectations by what you do online and take things slowly, I think it has real potential. You sound as though you have an interest in her and therefore an intention to get to know her better, so that's a great start. I suppose I wouldn't be so quick to just call it a relationship. Meet up for some coffee, develop it into a dinner date and take it from there.
While you get along online, I still maintain that the internet can still be quite depersonalised, especially if you're just using text. But it's a beginning and by the sounds of things, a very promising one. I hope it works out for you both
Yeah we do take things pretty slow, we want to talk on the phone but like I said taking our time. And I think we have a relationship together. But hey thanks for the kind words.
Benraianajones
New member
I agree, they can work. Though I have never been in one as such, I have met plenty of people via the internet - as friends mainly. It is always surprising how "different" people seem in person than the internet - even when you get on really well and know they wont judge you in person as harshly. Especially after you've met them for a first time, then speak again via the internet.
Only thing thing online relationships is, it has to ve enjoyable. After awhile, it can become a "chore" making sure you stick to "that deadline" to send that e-mail and so on. Giving too much of yourself is a bad thing, but too little of, is also bad. You have to get the balance right. Good luck!
Only thing thing online relationships is, it has to ve enjoyable. After awhile, it can become a "chore" making sure you stick to "that deadline" to send that e-mail and so on. Giving too much of yourself is a bad thing, but too little of, is also bad. You have to get the balance right. Good luck!
Violet
Moderator Emeritus
Major West said:
Could be argued, but comparing meeting through the written word to what I would call dull/bad date, isn't the best mode of comparison. Even so, I guess I have yet to find out for myself if that were true. Seeing that very few guys take my interest (and almost as few that are sober and single approach me) I guess that won't be happening anytime soon.
Besides my family have a huge veto against the internet and meeting people in real life from the internet when in truth I'd say that it's about as risky (for search of a better word) as the nightclub. However, I prefer the club. When you dance with someone, to me, it says a lot about someone, the style of dance, what they try to touch when they shouldn't and how they react when they realise, no means no.
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