"Never, never, interrupt me, okay? Not if there's a fire, not even if you hear the sound of a thud from my home and one week later there's a smell coming from there that can only be a decaying human body and you have to hold a hanky to your face because the stench is so thick that you think you're going to faint.
Even then, don't come knocking. Or, if it's election night, and you're excited and you wanna celebrate because some cotton picker that you date has been elected the first black president of the United States and he's going to have you down to Uncle Tom's Cabin, and you want someone to share the moment with. Even then, don't knock. Not on this door. Not for ANY reason. Do you get me, sweetheart?" - As Good as it Gets
"Excuse me? Excuse me, senor? May I speak to you please? I asked for a mai tai, and they brought me a pina colada, and I said no salt, NO salt for the margarita, but it had salt on it, big grains of salt, floating in the glass... And yes, I won't be leaving a tip, 'cause I could... I could shut this whole resort down.
Sir? I'll take my traveler's checks to a competing resort. I could write a letter to your board of tourism and I could have this place condemned. I could put... I could put... strychnine in the guacamole. There was salt on the glass, BIG grains of salt." Office Space