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Old 02-05-2010, 10:48 PM   #101
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Enemy of the State

Tell your story walkin...
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Old 02-05-2010, 11:00 PM   #102
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Jaws

"Japanese submarine slammed two torpedoes into her side, Chief. We was comin' back from the island of Tinian to Leyte. We'd just delivered the bomb. The Hiroshima bomb. Eleven hundred men went into the water. Vessel went down in 12 minutes.

Didn't see the first shark for about a half-hour. Tiger. 13-footer. You know how you know that in the water, Chief? You can tell by lookin' from the dorsal to the tail. What we didn't know, was that our bomb mission was so secret, no distress signal had been sent. They didn't even list us overdue for a week. Very first light, Chief, sharks come cruisin' by, so we formed ourselves into tight groups. It was sorta like you see in the calendars, you know the infantry squares in the old calendars like the Battle of Waterloo and the idea was the shark come to the nearest man, that man he starts poundin' and hollerin' and sometimes that shark he go away... but sometimes he wouldn't go away.

Sometimes that shark looks right at ya. Right into your eyes. And the thing about a shark is he's got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll's eyes. When he comes at ya, he doesn't even seem to be livin'... 'til he bites ya, and those black eyes roll over white and then... ah then you hear that terrible high-pitched screamin'. The ocean turns red, and despite all your poundin' and your hollerin' those sharks come in and... they rip you to pieces.

You know by the end of that first dawn, lost a hundred men. I don't know how many sharks there were, maybe a thousand. I do know how many men, they averaged six an hour. Thursday mornin', Chief, I bumped into a friend of mine, Herbie Robinson from Cleveland. Baseball player. Boson's mate. I thought he was asleep. I reached over to wake him up. He bobbed up, down in the water, he was like a kinda top. Upended. Well, he'd been bitten in half below the waist.

At noon on the fifth day, a Lockheed Ventura swung in low and he spotted us, a young pilot, lot younger than Mr. Hooper here, anyway he spotted us and a few hours later a big ol' fat PBY come down and started to pick us up. You know that was the time I was most frightened. Waitin' for my turn. I'll never put on a lifejacket again. So, eleven hundred men went into the water. 316 men come out, the sharks took the rest, June the 29th, 1945.

Anyway, we delivered the bomb." -Quint
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Old 02-05-2010, 11:08 PM   #103
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Suicide Kings

Boo-(censored)-Hoo. Go finish up at the bar. Brett's in the Jake.
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Old 02-05-2010, 11:15 PM   #104
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Star Wars

"Your droids, we don't serve their kind. They'll have to wait outside."
- the bartender
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Old 02-06-2010, 12:26 AM   #105
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Superman II

"General, would you care to step outside."

-Superman
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Old 02-06-2010, 12:39 AM   #106
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Rocky IV

"Go for it." - Rocky
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Old 02-06-2010, 02:04 AM   #107
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Kill Bill

I bet I could fry an egg on your head about now, if I wanted to.

(Bill)
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Old 02-06-2010, 02:22 AM   #108
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Casino

I'll crack your (censored) head wide open.

-Nicky Santoro
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Old 02-06-2010, 02:30 AM   #109
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Kill Bill

Silly Caucasian girl likes to play with samurai swords.

(O-Ren)
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Old 02-06-2010, 04:16 AM   #110
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What did I just say?

You told everyone to take out their Samurai swords and shave your butt.

(Rush Hour 2)
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Old 02-06-2010, 04:22 AM   #111
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Kill Bill

Drunken bum though I may be, I don't need booze that bad. But who the hell gives a crap anyway. That b*tch ain't gittin no Bushido points for killin a white trash piece of sh*t like me with a samurai sword. I'm a bouncer in a titty bar, Bill. If she wants to fight me, all she gotta do is come down to the Club, start some sh*t, and we'll be in a fight.

(Budd)
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Old 02-06-2010, 10:59 AM   #112
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White Men Can't Jump

Start a fight, neither of us will make any money.
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Old 02-06-2010, 11:05 AM   #113
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Ghost Rider

we're not gonna have a meaningful conversation now, are we? - Blackheart
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Old 02-06-2010, 11:12 AM   #114
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Stewie Griffin: The Untold Story

Yeah. I'm a little nervous, though. I'm not sure what to talk about.
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Old 02-06-2010, 11:17 AM   #115
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The Cider House Rules

Doubtless you will let me know what immensely worthwhile or at least useful thing that it is you find to [say].
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Old 02-06-2010, 11:23 AM   #116
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Family Guy

That's the same thing you said when you talked me out of cloud insurance.

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Old 02-06-2010, 11:25 AM   #117
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Caddyshack

"It's easy to grin when your ship comes in...
and you've got the stock market beat...
but the man worthwhile is the man who can smile...
when his shorts are too tight in the seat!"
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Old 02-06-2010, 11:26 AM   #118
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Family Guy

Hey, mother, I come bearing a gift. I'll give you a hint. It's in my diaper and it's not a toaster.

(Stewie)
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Old 02-06-2010, 11:29 AM   #119
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Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels

That is if it is what he says it is. I don't want to see it after a sample, I don't want to touch it after a sample.
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Old 02-06-2010, 11:38 AM   #120
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Family Guy

Now remember, kids, when we get to Mr. Quagmire's cabin, don't touch anything before I have a chance to disinfect it.
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Old 02-06-2010, 02:38 PM   #121
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Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man

Well thats okay. It's better to be dead and cool than alive and uncool.
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Old 02-06-2010, 02:47 PM   #122
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From Dusk Till Dawn

Take a pill, kid. I just meant stay cool.

(Seth)
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Old 02-06-2010, 02:54 PM   #123
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Dumb and Dumber

Harry! Your hands are freezing!
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Old 02-06-2010, 03:09 PM   #124
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Alien

The best thing to do is just to freeze him. Stop the goddam disease. He can get a doctor to look at him when we get back home.

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Old 02-06-2010, 03:43 PM   #125
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Where the Buffalo Roam

Doctor of pure Gonzo journalism.
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