Hollow Earth sucks!
I'm sorry, but this is one of the worst books I have ever red, and believe me, I red a lot of books. I just how to get this out of my chest!
Spoiler alert!
Ok, so let?s start from the beginning shall we? The beginning is actually rather good, an old man showing at Indy?s doorstep giving him a little wooden box and his journal. Even the chase scene on the train station with Reingold is interesting, although their conversation inside the train is dull.
Indy is supposed to be a smart man and yet he doesn?t find anything suspicious about Reingold picking up his suitcase ?by mistake?.
So finally we arrive at the scene when Indy is burried alive. When he finally manages to get out of the coffin, instead of immediately head for the hotel (or the police station) he just continues to talk, out in the cold, in his underwear with Baldwin?s niece, gravedigger and Lincoln Ellsworth. And they aren?t surpised by Indy?s burrial at all (or if they are, their surprise lasts very short).
Indy finally heads for the hotel, and then goes to a restaurant for a lunch. From the window he witnesses a bank robbery. Some ganster starts shooting everywhere and Indy ducks beneath the table, together with the waitress, who, in turns decides to kiss a complete stranger while bullets are flying over their heads. Was this really necessary Mr. McCoy?
Then Indy goes all pissed off and cocky, so he jumps out the window, walks to the gangester, completely unarmed, of course and punches him in the face, ending the robbery. Bravo, Dr. Jones! Bravo! And all this just to steal the journal from Indy. There wasn?t any other way?
After that, the story takes a complete twist and stops focusing on the wooden box and Hollow Earth but instead focuses on Indy going to New Mexico to find some gold so he can pay for an information to locate a Crystall Skull which in turn can heal his girlfriend Alecia?or something like that. I?ve heard that Hollow Earth is actually a sequel to Philosopher? Stone, and since I haven?t read the latter, then maybe this is why he is going to New Mexico but I still think that Mr. McCoy could have explained this a little better.
Speaking to locals, Indy founds out about a crazy Indian boy John Seven Oaks running around killing people. He then goes to this whole underground complex to finally find the gold he is looking for. And then he is saved by the worst character ever in the history of literature: Ulla Tornaes.
Ulla is incredibly cold and dettached, masculine, stubborn and everything is a joke for her. She laughs at the face of death. Literally. She is basically a ticking time bomb. She doesn?t care about her fate or the fate of others.
We can clearly see that when a guy threatens her and Indy with a rifle if they don?t give them the gold, both Indy and Ulla are making jokes on his account. And instead of shooting them, that guy just keeps talking and talking and talking. Pretty soon we found out his entire biography. And then, hold and behold, who appears out of nowhere to save our heroes? Of course! John Seven Oaks! Isn?t the world a small place or what?
After that, our heroes manage to arrive at New Orleans. So Ulla and Indy are walking on a crowded street and suddenly, some thugs kidnap Ulla. Indy follows them, kicks their asses with his whip and save Ulla. My only question is ? why? Why was this important to the story? The answer: it wasn?t. It is a complete waste of ink and paper.
And once arriving at a hotel, Ulla, of course, reacts as if nothing happened. As if she was already kidnapped a million times in her life.
Finally, Indy meets Belloq. Belloq offends Indy and Indy challenges him to a duel. And just so Ulla isn?t completely useless, she goes out and buys them guns. How sweet of her!
So that?s it. They just decided to duel. Out of clear blue sky. Like they are planning fishing or something. It?s all just one big JOKE to them. All of them: Indy, Belloq, Ulla. They just don?t care if they die. They don?t realize, at any moment, the gravity of situation, its consequences, and its results. No. Let?s duel to a death. Ok! See ya tomorrow at 6 o clock. Oh, and bring some doughnuts. I?m always hungry in the morning. Jesus Christ.
And finally, Indy ends up in Arctic, searching for this Crystall Skull. He, Ulla and a boy genius Sparks eventually got lost. But we all know how Arctic is a heavily populated area, right? So no surprise that they stumble upon a fat old hunter named Gunnar.
So?to make long story short, Ulla gots shot (yay!) but survives (meh?), the bad guy dies, Indy saves the world and bla bla. The usual ending.
Rarely a book made me so sick to actually close it and stop reading it.
I red The Dance of Giants who also isn?t a masterpiece but it?s way better than this garbage. If people say Hollow Earth is the best Indy novel, I really don?t want to read the rest, which is a pity, as I was planning to collect them.
End rant