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Old 07-24-2017, 01:58 AM   #1
Attila the Professor
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Lego Indy in "The Onion"

Ok, which of you jokers writes for The Onion?

I Did Warn You Not To Get Me Started On The Shortcomings Of The ‘Lego Indiana Jones’ Games

Well, there we go, Adam. You had to reopen an old wound.

I apologize for derailing the discussion, and I will let you make your point in due time, but when provoked with a statement on this subject so staggeringly ignorant as “I actually thought they were pretty fun,” I cannot maintain both my silence and my conscience. The Lego Indiana Jones video games are fraught with glaring shortcomings that I feel duty-bound to report, if only as a warning. Does “fun,” in your own personal glossary, mean seeing a classic motion picture series chewed up and regurgitated as pointless tests of rudimentary motor skill? Or is it time-devouring stretches with no idea where to go or what to do that fill your soul with gladness?

This is no rash or ill-considered opinion, mind you. Had the games only lived up to the quality standard of the Lego building sets, I would have been elated. Nor is this a tantrum about the game not matching the movies beat for beat, or misplaced rage over the unforgivable betrayal that was Lego The Hobbit. The simple fact of the matter is that LucasArts, in cooperation with Traveller’s Tales, wrought two indisputably flawed exercises in tedium and futility with their adaptations of the Indiana Jones films.

Allow me to start with Lego Indiana Jones: The Original Adventures, the first of their two alternately ineffectual and frustrating bagatelles, and a game you said “has some puzzle elements that are kind of cool.” Your assessment is as bewildering to me as it is disappointing, Adam, because from the moment its opening cut-scene ends, the game reveals itself not as an intriguing series of mysteries for the player to solve in pursuit of a priceless artifact, but a tiresome laundry list of errands to be obeyed in strict sequence.

It goes on from there.

Last edited by Attila the Professor : 07-24-2017 at 02:12 AM.
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Old 07-24-2017, 09:26 AM   #2
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I loved the first game and didn't care for the second. My wife and I are quite the team when it comes to these games.
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