Annoying Kid Next Door

The Drifter

New member
Me and my wife moved into our house in September. I like it here, but there is an annoying kid that lives a few houses down.
He is four, and comes over every day to play with my kids. He never knocks, he just barges inside with his muddy shoes on. His mom never asks if it's okay if he comes over either.

I know my kids are not perfect. They can be pretty mean when they want to be, but this kid NEVER listens to me or my wife. He has called my six year-old daughter some pretty bad words, and uses racial slurs around her.
He drags trash all in my yard, throws things at my kids, and he's always causing some sort of havoc. He's even told my wife that he was gonna bust her face.

This is every single day.
I have been sick all day, and told him to go on home (I did not want to deal with him), but he won't listen. He either just ignored me, or he would be back over here again in five minutes.
I know he's just a kid, but I'm at my wits end with him. I've told him countless times to behave or go home, but he ignores all of this.

How would you handle this situation? It's really getting to me.
 
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Pale Horse

Moderator
Staff member
spanking.jpg


........10
 

Indy's brother

New member
If it were me, I would tell the kid to do as I say or I'll go get his mother. If that didn't work, I would then make good on it.

Works with the neighborhood kids here that used to knock on our door 5x a day or more. They are all fairly well neglected by their parents, which is why they are here all the time. But they are all neglected because their parents cannot be bothered to shoulder the responsibility of their own kids. That means they also don't want to deal with any problems that may arise from their offspring annoying their neighbor. Of course the discipline in these houses swing from either none to severe with no middle ground (it seems), so just the threat of bringing their parents into it usually straightens them right up.

They can act however they like elsewhere, but they all behave pretty well at our house now.

The truth is I feel bad for the little guys.
 

The Drifter

New member
Indy's brother said:
If it were me, I would tell the kid to do as I say or I'll go get his mother. If that didn't work, I would then make good on it.

Works with the neighborhood kids here that used to knock on our door 5x a day or more. They are all fairly well neglected by their parents, which is why they are here all the time. But they are all neglected because their parents cannot be bothered to shoulder the responsibility of their own kids. That means they also don't want to deal with any problems that may arise from their offspring annoying their neighbor. Of course the discipline in these houses swing from either none to severe with no middle ground (it seems), so just the threat of bringing their parents into it usually straightens them right up.

They can act however they like elsewhere, but they all behave pretty well at our house now.

The truth is I feel bad for the little guys.


He only has his mom over there. I don't know what happened to his dad. His mom is always strung out on pain-pills. The kid runs around wild. There is a set of railroad tracks behind our homes, and a dirt road. He has a path beside this that he walks to get to my backyard.
She never watches him and I fear he may be on the tracks one day when a train comes. It's sad really.
 

Indy's brother

New member
Lonsome_Drifter said:
He only has his mom over there. I don't know what happened to his dad. His mom is always strung out on pain-pills. The kid runs around wild. There is a set of railroad tracks behind our homes, and a dirt road. He has a path beside this that he walks to get to my backyard.
She never watches him and I fear he may be on the tracks one day when a train comes. It's sad really.

Aw man. That's horrible. Some kids are just born to be a PITA, but a bad parent can easily screw up an otherwise good kid. I see how other kids are raised and it makes me want to cry. I guess all you can do is punish him by sending him home. From the brief description of his 4 year-old life you've given, it would seem like quite a motivator if you can provide a decent environment for him to play and have a little structure (which kids need, no matter how bad they fight it).
 

DiscoLad

New member
Sounds to me like it is time to get proper authorities involved, All joking aside. :(

The way it looks is the child is a nuisance and the mother is not in control, I suggest calling it in.
I would think it is in the best interests of everyone involved.

Just two cents, but hope it helps.
 

The Drifter

New member
I'm thinking of calling Social Services, but I will wait and see what happens. I hate to see a child ripped from his home, but it seems that is what the kid needs. To be away from that type of environment.
 

DiscoLad

New member
Lonsome_Drifter said:
I'm thinking of calling Social Services, but I will wait and see what happens. I hate to see a child ripped from his home, but it seems that is what the kid needs. To be away from that type of environment.

Exactly, You took the words right out of my mouth.

I see it as something that would help the boy in the future, rather something negative.
 

Indy's brother

New member
DiscoLad said:
Sounds to me like it is time to get proper authorities involved

No kidding, my boy is 4, and there is NO WAY I would let him wander the neighborhood. That goes beyond neglect and borders on child endangerment. I was taken away by DCFS when I was just a few months old for pretty much the same reasons and was eventually adopted and had a normal life. DCFS ALWAYS gives the parent a chance to straighten up before completely taking over. They would rather have the child raised by their own parent(s) if at all possible. You don't want this kid on your conscience should he disappear or something equally tragic happen. Discolad deserves props for pointing this out first. You should probably have a sit-down with your wife and seriously discuss it. Sucks, I know. My parents almost had to call DCFS on my own sister before her live-in boyfriend beat us to it.

edit: fyi the previous 2 replies were posted while I was typing this one
 

The Drifter

New member
You both are right. I am going to sit down with my wife and see about calling SS, or CPS. It is not this kid's fault on how he behaves, and it is dangerous the way he can run around here and his mom never checking in on him. There is a set of railroad-tracks, and below that is a river. Above us is a highway also.
I know it's for his best interest that I call, but it is still hard to do. I don't want to cause him to be away from his mom, but I could never live with myself if something happened to him.
 

Indy Scout 117

New member
hmm....reminds me of an Everybody loves Raymond episode. lol haha yeah i could tell you how to handle it...but it wouldnt be helpful...or legal for that matter :p try to scare the kid. intimidate him a little, make him worried. kinda like you would if a teenage boy was dating your daughter. you'd want to get him scared, y'know? let him know that if he screws up, he's in for hell. thats what i'd do... :p
 

Chewbacca Jones

New member
I agree. Take legal, official steps. It's best for the kid, not to mention your family. Also, at the risk of stating the obvious - lock your door. Odds are SS won't act very quickly, and you need to look out for your own kids and your home in the meantime. If your kids don't yet have the habit of locking the doors behind them when they come in, it may be time to teach them.
 

Yure

Well-known member
I agree as well, and I would act fast. Also with such a close danger like unguarded tracks, should anything happen to the kid you would wish you called social services before and you'll stuck with remorse even if it's absolutely not your fault.
 

Goodeknight

New member
Like many others, I agree about calling social services. Could be that's what it takes to get the mom to straighten up. SS's goal is to keep families together. So no matter what, mom will get many, many chances to get her act together. If the kid's not a complete malnourished wreck with bruises all over, maybe mom isn't too far gone. It might not be a long journey for her to get back on track before her kid gets hit by a train.

However, if he's not that bad off (no bruises, obvious neglect issues, etc.) then SS might not do anything at all.

At that point, it's your call whether to force the kid to stop coming over -- or -- take the responsibility to teach him how to behave during the countless hours he spends at your place.

Honestly, that should be easy enough. Either he behaves, or you kick him out of the house. Lay down the law. "You're going to bust my wife's face? Go home right now." A few stiff penalties like that and he'll be straight as an arrow. If he drags trash into the yard, make him clean it up before he can start hanging out or playing. If he tracks mud in, give him the bucket and make him clean it up before taking another step. He'll learn quickly. (Might make an even bigger mess in the process, but he won't do it more than a few times.)

Kids are very trainable, even neighbors' kids.

Best of luck, and keep us posted.
 

Dr Bones

New member
No way should a 4 year old be left to wander outside unsupervised. There's a lot more than trains out there!

Social Services must be informed ASAP as this is an onging issue and you are probably not the first to report it. You could tackle the issues with her yourself if you feel you can but where would that land you? You could end up the target of her anger or blamed when SS do inevitably become involved.

She doesn't sound likd the type to thank you for your concern, more like smash your windows and wreck the paintwork on your car.

She either needs help or her needs to be taken away from her for his sake.

How he behaves round you and your kids is a nuisabce but is to me not the issue. His welfare is paramount.

Sad as it is when people are on the skids and need help for whatever reason, but when a kid is at risk you can spare me the PC soflty softly BS. She is not caring for him (or herself?) in an adequate manner.

Is it your job to teach, suprvise or even raise this kid? Do you feel some moral obligation or higher calling to take him in?

Do the right thing. Please. He is a 4 year old for pity's sake. It's only a matter of time before something bad will happen.

Make that call.
 
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