No Name-Calling week

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PokeSonicIndy

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This week at my school (and other schools maybe) we're having "No Name-calling week" where there is no name-calling and today we did an assignment about bullying and the forms it comes in along with videos to watch about it.

The point being is that everyone was bullied at least one point in their life and I wish to have people tell their story. I'll go first (I'll tell two):

When I was little, my mom and I went to this girl's party. Everyone was inside except for me then these older boys came and took me into the bounce house. I guess I was holding a sippy cup then because the boys then surrounded me in the bounce house and made fun of me for having a sippy cup. I remember trying to get out of there but the boys blocked me and kept making fun of me for God-knows how long until they left.

No one came to help me. I don't think I told anyone for some reason. I remember DREAMING about it, but I don't think I told anyone until a therapy session years later.

Becuase of my OCD being an anxiety-disorder (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obsessive–compulsive_disorder) it would have been hard enough to interact or make friends. I think this incident probably made it more difficult, I don't know.

Next one. It happened today; at school. These annoying boys, Stefan and Nolan, started hissing and snorting at me like pigs. At first, it annoyed me. But then later, I realized it hurt.

(You know what, this thread and what I've said might be a REAL dicussion starter and please, whatever it is, don't judge me)

Okay, your turn:
 

Goodeknight

New member
Ignore Pale Horse.

No Name Calling week is a great idea. Bullying is a terrible and painful thing. Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can scar for life.

Sorry to hear about those experiences, Sonic. It truly is lousy. I know you've heard it already, but most of the time people bully others so they can make themselves feel bigger or better about themselves. It's really a sign of weakness on their part. Of course, knowing that doesn't help very much if you're being bullied, but it's the truth.

People don't often bully in private, just in front of other people. That way they can gang up and get together, get in tighter with each other at the expense of someone else. That's the sign of weakness and insecurity.

From my Christian perspective, I can say God loves you just the way you are. He made you and has a plan for your life. Don't let bullies get in the way of that.

Let me tell you this, I'm 40 and I can still remember instances of being bullied when I was a kid. I started school a little earlier than most, so I was always the youngest in my class, which meant I was usually a bit smaller than everyone else. So I wasn't very athletic at the time. And I'm no genius, but I was smarter than most. So sometimes a jock or in crowd type picked on me. Sometimes a dumb ruffian.

However --- by the time I graduated from high school I had a few growth spurts, got caught up physically, and turned out to be one of the fastest guys on the track team.

I've noticed on Facebook that a lot of people I went to high school with hit their peaks in school and have gone downhill ever since, jocks, in crowd, and dumb ruffians included. As for me, I have a wonderful, beautiful wife who I adore, and we have an awesome son. I've got a great job that I love, and I fit in with the people around me. Most of them have awesome lives -- and also got picked on in school because they were a little different. My wife and I are building our dream house. I've traveled the world. I'm making a difference, and I really enjoy what I do.

So, Sonic, my advice is, forget about the bullies and don't compromise your values trying to fit in with them or anyone else. Be yourself, and find people who respect that. School won't last for the rest of your life.
 

Dr. Gonzo

New member
Here's the thing man, I'm not sure how old you are, and I hope this doesn't come off wrong cause I'm trying to help, but one thing that you'll come to understand eventually is as soon as you put the word "NO" in front of something it makes it all the more tempting to do it.

It's human nature really -- if you put a sign on something that says "Don't touch" Somebody is going to touch it just because it says "don't".

Pale Horse after your comment... had the thread been closed... I would have chuckled. Jesus, I'm a bad person :eek:
 
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Pale Horse

Moderator
Staff member
Dr. Gonzo said:
Pale Horse after your comment... had the thread been closed... I would have chuckled. Jesus, I'm a bad person :eek:

"You're waiting for a train, a train that will take you far away. You know where you hope this train will take you, but you don't know for sure. But it doesn't matter. How can it not matter to you where that train will take you?"

Whoops! Wrong thread. :p
 

Nurhachi1991

Well-known member
What happened to just throwing a punch at the school yard bully? I mean even if you lost you still made a point..
 

The_Raiders

Well-known member
Nurhachi1991 said:
What happened to just throwing a punch at the school yard bully? I mean even if you lost you still made a point..

Wouldn't work where I go to school at, you'd be kicked out. As for the topic. Bullying is an interesting subject to hit. I've been on both sides of the fence. I've been bullied, and I have bullied. The bullying I've experienced was never that bad. Just some jocks talking crap about me because I liked star wars so much. That's about it. I started hanging out with the "bad kids" and dressing like them too, so people eventually stopped messing with me, not because I looked like a badass or anything, they just ignored me. I was an invisible kid sort of. All of this was at a different school than I'm at now.
But At this other school, I remember a kid who me and my new friends would torrment from time to time. He only had like one friend, and we'd come up and talk to him like we were trying to be his friend and then say something mean to him, or we'd grab his back pack and run off, and laugh as he chased us to get it back. I feel really terrible about it now. That was quite a few years ago back in middle school. It's true what they say though, i just wanted my new "friends" to think I was cool, and make girls laugh cause I'm such a hard ass. Truth is, I wish I could find that kid and tell him how sorry I am for the way I treated him. I've matured a lot since then, and I hate the feeling i get when I think about him, so I always try my hardest to be a friend to everyone now.
Bullying sucks, and it does hurt, I know I've had some more instances of being bullied that hurt, but I can't quite recall any of them now. But hey, that's my two cents worth. :rolleyes:
 

Mickiana

Well-known member
Thanks for that honesty, The Raiders. I'm in that same boat. I cringe when i think of people I've done ill against. Why do we do it? We hate it when it's done to us. I've just got to work on my conscience.
 

Sharkey

Guest
The_Raiders said:
Wouldn't work where I go to school at, you'd be kicked out. As for the topic. Bullying is an interesting subject to hit. I've been on both sides of the fence. I've been bullied, and I have bullied. The bullying I've experienced was never that bad. Just some jocks talking crap about me because I liked star wars so much. That's about it. I started hanging out with the "bad kids" and dressing like them too, so people eventually stopped messing with me, not because I looked like a badass or anything, they just ignored me. I was an invisible kid sort of. All of this was at a different school than I'm at now.
But At this other school, I remember a kid who me and my new friends would torrment from time to time. He only had like one friend, and we'd come up and talk to him like we were trying to be his friend and then say something mean to him, or we'd grab his back pack and run off, and laugh as he chased us to get it back. I feel really terrible about it now. That was quite a few years ago back in middle school. It's true what they say though, i just wanted my new "friends" to think I was cool, and make girls laugh cause I'm such a hard ass. Truth is, I wish I could find that kid and tell him how sorry I am for the way I treated him. I've matured a lot since then, and I hate the feeling i get when I think about him, so I always try my hardest to be a friend to everyone now.
Bullying sucks, and it does hurt, I know I've had some more instances of being bullied that hurt, but I can't quite recall any of them now. But hey, that's my two cents worth. :rolleyes:
what a Dick.

as for the rest of you put on your big boy pants.
 

HJTHX1138

New member
I'm kinda suprised this whole anti-bullling thing has become such an agenda, most people just sat with it and couldn't do anything.

I did have a "Anti-Bully" day in high school, they also tried a "Sit with someone you usually exclude day" the latter didn't turn out well.

I had long hair, so if I wasn't getting crap for that, it was like they needed an excuse to get my attention.

I had this one pen with Boba Fett on it, it was the equivalent of having a siamese twin in a basket to this one really stupid jock guy. So I was put into some sort of social classification because of a pen, even though I was only there for a few weeks and had no friends. This set some sort of score, so all the jocks were weirded out by me.

This kinda thing happened with everybody. I didn't like talking to people, so everyone was trying to define me by something. Whatever I liked turned into some sort of challenge or an excuse to converse. I didn't really interpret it as friendly though, it seemed like they were just screwing with me.

Even girls do this: I gave this one girl her magazine back when her friends were throwing it around, this convinced them I was in love with her or something. I never heard the end of it, they never left me alone. I just tried avoiding them or being really snarky back.

It made everyone think I hated them, I was never really friends with anyone after that.

It's best to just put stuff behind you, real people aren't going to be a bunch of immature push-overs. When it comes to being social, you win some and you lose some.

Sharkey said:
as for the rest of you put on your big boy pants.

Pants are for the weak . . .


225px-Zapp_promo_2.jpg
 
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The_Raiders

Well-known member
Sharkey said:
what a Dick.

as for the rest of you put on your big boy pants.


Haha, I was to that kid. I'll admit it. Me and my friends we're pretty terrible to him. We never pushed him around or nothing, just comments that would upset him, or taking his stuff, running off with it then throwing it back. I hate that I did it though. If I should ever see that kid again I'll apologize my guts out.
I never deal with bullying anymore. I remember though at my old school I got some crap from some guys when they caught me and my friends looking at a star wars insider magazine. They were hoping it was something else, and when they discovered it was star wars they gave us some crap. Another dude said he was gonna beat us up just because we liked star wars, and then the next year he came to school a star wars fan.
Now I usually try to avoid socializing with people I go to school with. I'm a senior so my main goal is to just get graduated and get out of there. The people at my current school are all usually friendly. It's a charter school, and you gotta be accepted into it. Most of the kids there all come from similar back grounds. They were the ones that were bullied, or the ones that people thought would go no where in life, so this school is kind of like a second chance to everyone, and everyone is a lot more real with eachother.

Mickiana said:
Thanks for that honesty, The Raiders. I'm in that same boat. I cringe when i think of people I've done ill against. Why do we do it? We hate it when it's done to us. I've just got to work on my conscience.

I figured we'd gain some insight hearing tales from the mind of someone who was a bully. That kid was a nice kid too. Never did anything mean to anyone. I think what they say is right though, about bullies doing it just to feel better about themselves. I had been picked on for being a star wars nerd, and no one talked to me besides my small group of buddies, so picking on someone a little less fortunate I figured would make me appear cooler to everyone. It was stupid.
I wouldn't ever mess with anyone again. After being hurt a couple times, I wouldn't want to make anyone else feel that way. Besides, they're usually the ones who end up being our bosses one day!
 
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Violet

Moderator Emeritus
I'll say something here esp since it's something of a big issue and not talking about it, only makes things worse (and besides, it's time for a female bullying story).

I was never the bully. I was always the victim. And I was bullied all my schooling life- and I have no shame in saying that. People started bullying me based on the mere facts I was left-handed, had a weird last name and was Italian. And have had anti-Jew insults even though I'm seriously not a Jew and have been accused of denial. And even my looks when I was a teen. Heck, there were even mean comments from mean girls at film school.

I even have had teachers bully me. One in fact, said I would never be accepted into film school, let alone pass and graduate, let alone get a job in the industry, let alone get to Hollywood and let alone win an Oscar. I managed 3 out of 5 thus far. ;) Now, I don't know if I'll ever manage the other 2, but there's some satisfaction in proving her wrong on the main points. I made it in, I never failed a subject and I graduated with a job (at the time). And I have been to Hollywood (just haven't worked in industry there):p . I also have a film festival award for a music video and produced a film for Korean television.

And btw, for years as a kid I was accused of being dumb and slow by teachers and students..... I ended up graduating from high school as the Academic Dux of my year (that is top student). I also have a Guinness World Record in my name (in a different field). Granted it's shared, but it's still something.

Ultimately, bullying didn't stop me in the end. And though it would get me down, I didn't stop doing the things I love and still don't even though I told constantly that I'm a dreamer and that I'm wrong to still put together projects that though will probably never make me a cent, it makes me happy.
 

Mickiana

Well-known member
Good on you, Violet. Just rereading my last post, I want to make it clear I wasn't a bully per se. I would actually defend the victims of bullies by intimidation of the bullies. Bullies are cowards and seek to victimise a prone person. My problem is my physical appearance. I am tall, heavily built and with a shaved head. I've been called a Neo Nazi in public. Guys with a bit of booze in them feel the need to take me on to prove themselves. If I even defend myself against something I can easily be seen as an aggressor. I just walk away now from a situation. But I hate seeing people picked on when it is clear they can't defend themselves.
 

The_Raiders

Well-known member
I havn't seen any bullying issues since I started high school pretty much. I've had some people talk some smack to me because I'm really slow in math, but I'm able to defend myself now.
I don't see anyone get bullied either, but when I hear talk going on about someone I usually stand up for them, if I know who it is. Everyone has something to offer, no one deserves to be knocked around just for who they are.
 
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