I dont know how to say this but my life has gone all to ####.
About two weeks ago I came home and with a big smiley face
my wife told me that she got a three dollar raise at her job.
I said "Wow thats grate."
Then she teles me that she wants a divorce to live the house right now and that she is going to take take everything
So now all I have is a box of clothes and some rolling tobacco.
Gee, Webley. I'm afraid that there is little I can say that can console you, having very little experience in the form of something as disheartening as what you are going through right now. Please, know that for the most part the entire community here wishes better for you. As Temple said, "It will get better." I know enough to know that that is true. Life has its ups and downs and I'm sure it is currently rather down for you. After some time passes I'm sure things will look a bit up again.
Location: At the front row of Indy's class at Barnett College - a girl can dream! recently moved from UK and now in Pennsylvania, USA!!!
Posts: 2,207
Webley, hon, I just want to say that everything Temple of John has said is true. It's hard and its painful, there's no doubt about that, but believe me when I tell you that time is a great healer.
Keep fighting, my friend. Things will get better. Trust me on that.
Like I said on COW, if you want to talk at any time, I will give you a ring. Also spending a few days at Temple's place will make you feel better, my friend.
I dont know how to say this but my life has gone all to ####.
About two weeks ago I came home and with a big smiley face
my wife told me that she got a three dollar raise at her job.
I said "Wow thats grate."
Then she teles me that she wants a divorce to live the house right now and that she is going to take take everything
So now all I have is a box of clothes and some rolling tobacco.
I know how you feel, Webley. One time somebody stole my Jurassic Park T-rex.
Just kidding. I don't know how you feel. Sorry, but your ex-wife sounds like a real ####. What were her reasons?
Having been almost been through a divorce myself (my husband and I had a trial seperation when his drinking got out of hand) and have had numerous step-in-laws (my FIL is on his fifth marriage, my MIL her second), I understand a bit what you are going through.
It takes time to heal. It really does. During my seperation last year, the first month was unbearable and numb. Afterwards (and especially when we were able to talk it out), I started to feel better.
Is there perhaps a counselor you can talk to? Or perhaps (if you are a relgious man) talk to your priest/pastor/minister? It still helps from time to time when I talk to mine. Or you can always vent here. We're al here for you.
There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.
There is another theory which states that this has already happened.
Both theories also apply equally well to women.
"Is there perhaps a counselor/priest you can talk to? "
Damn good advice that!
There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.
There is another theory which states that this has already happened.
Both theories also apply equally well to women.
Boy, is that the truth. I think most women think that they are exempt from logical thought and reasoning.
And I think most women would say exactly the same thing about men
I somewhat subscribe to the theory that we are, men and women that is, two totally different species that, through a fluke of evolutionary schadenfreude, are totally dependant on each other to keep both species alive.
That's true; my mother is always saying how stupid and worthless and idiotic men are. I think the basic reason for this is a breakdown in communication, and while I don't believe in the theory of evolution, it's obvious that both genders kind of check and balance the other.
I'm not convinced that men and women are even capable of truly communicating!
LOL
"I don't believe in the theory of evolution"
Fortunately, the facts of evolution don't rely on your belief... Like gravity or tea-time, or Canada, it exists whether you believe or not....
(Man... I've been reading too much Douglas Adams lately)
LOL
Hey Web man, sorry to hear (read) the news. man life is a B**ch sometimes. Dude taek it easy, breath, rememeber time heals all wounds, and what dosen't kill you only makes you stronger, stupid cliche's I know, but they are true.
i'm most honestly sorry for you, webley. but most of all you should be aware that only situations like this are able to shape a strong character. if you get over this (and i think we all agree that you definitely will), you'll emerge a more self-confident man than you were ever before. people who run and just hope they won't stumble and fall will never run as venturesome as those who know they can fall and also know they can get up again.
you're witnessing life in a trait that is its most violent but also its most beautiful - it's straightforward. anything else would just be a sterile enviroment. don't let this break your trust. trust wouldn't be worth a cent if it didn't demand of you to overcome the fear of being disappointed. if everybody and everything would be reliable, trust would be a meaningless word. i've been disappointed myself many times. i'm more cautious now but also more confident in my decisions about who i can trust.
We can all relate to the feeling of a shattered heart. Just a couple of years ago I myself hit the bottom of the barrel after a crushing breakup, going so far as to contemplate suicide (and, to a degree, attempt to act on it).
Things will get better. You will ride out this rough patch. Trust me, you'll get through it.
Hey Webly, maybe this will not mean much to you but I have an advice for you.
If it is not too late do everything to keep that marriage alive. Find the source of the problem and solve it. She is worth it. You both are.
Hay guys physically Im ok Iv been sleeping on the couches of friends and family and I can still get to work. Its hard for me to get in front of a computer though.
Dan.
_________________
Short Round is cooler than Indy
Hey Web! You're all right. Your mind is spinning as you ponder the fate of your stuff. Relax, you're what's important. Hopefully you didn't hide your cash under the mattress like a guy I know. In today's legal culture, crying harrassment to the cops gets the other locked up. Then it's a race to the courthouse for a restraining order, for any damn reason whatsoever. It's like staking a claim in the gold rush. The fastest gets the house until the courts straighten out your affairs 2 or 3 months later. I don't even know if you rent or own, or the name(s) on the deed, so you might want to find a lawyer. If you can work it out, by all means do, just don't trespass.
I know a lot of happy second marriages secured by pre-nuptial (or post-nuptial) agreements tucked away in safety deposit boxes or elsewhere. My question is, ladies, why not for the first marriage?
Hey fellas, why not consider the pre-nup when she offers it to you? If you agree to split, keep what you had, keep what you made. That's the simplest scenario. Having a pre-nup is the least bad divorce scenario. I'm not solving problems here, just looking for a way to take temptation out of the equation.
